Archive | August 2016

Local Authors Reviewed: Part One

As you may remember, a few weeks ago I went to a local authors event to do some networking and get opinions on the best self-publishing platform and was given four books by local authors to review. Here are the first three.

As always, I received these in return for honest reviews. I am going to be very honest. Sorry.

Selected Poems, by Michael Nilsen (poetry)

Published by: Matador

Publication Date: October 2015

ISBN: 9781784624705

Price:£9.99

A collection of poems written over a 22 year period and covering a range of themes including nature, autobiography and surrealism.

My Review

The nature poems were the most affecting and well-written, with great imagination. Unfortunately most of the poems didn’t move me all that much although they could have a different effect on other people. Poetry is subjective like that.

The Crooked Link, by David Evardson (General adult fiction)

Published by:Self-published

Publication date: 2016

ISBN: 9781522901259

Price:Unknown

Stanley is a crook, a crook who happens to have stolen money from an even bigger crook in London. When he turns up in Cleethorpes with a plan to buy a house, if he can sell his London flat first. A chain of buyers and sellers build but the chain is only as strong as it’s weakest link, and this link is crooked.

My Review

The plot is good but the execution needs work. It feels like a first novel even though the author has written several books before. It doesn’t quite ring true enough to become immersed in the plot, although the attempt at local dialect is good.

Marikka, by Sam Hawksmoor (children’s fiction)

Published by: Hammer & Tong UK

Publication Date: 2015

ISBN: 9781511994224

Price: Unknown

Marikka flees from an arson attack on her home to the sea, where she meets Mika – a runaway working for a sinister, scarred man hiding from the world. Meanwhile her father, long thought dead, searches for her with the aide of ‘the girl who can read objects’.

My Review

The plot reminds me of an Enid Blyton novel that has been modernised, including the sinister, mysterious villains and the evil step-father. I really quite enjoyed it and I admit to bawling like a baby at end. I liked the main characters, the plot was good, the chapter titles funny and the writing fluent. There were editing errors, e.g. instance instead of instant, minor things I had to parse to get the gist of the sentence but nothing that a re-edit won’t fix. Definitely a good one for the young teenager before they move on to more challenging books.


I have just one other book to read, For the love of Emily by Joy Wood. I haven’t started it yet but I will soon. The books are piling up again on my to be read list. I’ve been working on craft projects and writing assignments. Before I start University at the end of September I want to get the non-fiction assignments of my Writer’s Bureau course completed. I’m almost done, I have one task left to do on the final non-fiction assignment, and I shall tackle that tomorrow.

For those following the Saga of the Bath, finally today, after nine and a half weeks, the landlord sent a plumber to replace the old bath with a shiny new one. Or, I should say, the letting’s agent did. I intend to wallow in that thing tomorrow morning.

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What I learnt in Paris

A long list of things I learnt in Paris that might be of use to other novice travellers (it was orginally ten but the lessons got away from me).

  1. The French are fucking insane and should never be allowed near cars, vans, motorcycle or bicycles.Traffic laws seem to mean nothing and crossing the road means taking your life in your hands and hoping you make it across the road before someone decides to just drive over the crossing. Crossing when the green man is lit is only marginally less dangerous than using a crossing without lights. Follow the example of the locals and cross when they do.
  2. Motoercycles and bicycles are incredibly common means of transport in Paris. When crossing the road, be sure t0o make an extra observation behind you as they tend to appear from nowhere and sometimes ride on the footpath. There are dedicated cycle lanes on the pavements – try to avoid walking in them. Bicycles can be rented from racks all over the city and can be left at any other official rack.
  3. Restaurants have English language menus; they’ll either give them to you when you walk in and are obviously a tourist or you can ask for them and you won’t have to struggle with trying to make sense of the menu in French if your language skills are so-so.
  4. Always wait to be seated when you enter a cafe or restaurent. The waiter will ask how many and whether you want to sit inside or outside. Most of them speak reasonable English if you need help.
  5. Portions are huge! It might seem expensive but you get a generously sized meal. eat where there are lots of locals; if they like it the food will probably be good. You almost always get a bottle of table water to go with your meal so if you’re on a budget don’t order a drink.
  6. The Louvre is open until 9.45 pm on a Wednesday and Friday, I recommend going in the late afternoon/early evening when the crowds have thinned out and it’s less sweltering outside. It is very hot in some parts of the Louvre purely because of the number of people in the building, which is something to bear in mind when visiting. You won’t need a coat. 
  7. Again, at the Louvre, and other attractions, you can pre-book your tickets online and get the e-tickets on your phone. This allows you to skip the much longer queue for security. People in wheel chairs and those with children in push chairs are also sent to the head of the queue. 
  8. Watch for the beggers; they  sometimes claim to be raising money for a deaf and blind or dumb charity or a disabled association and present official looking sponser forms. They are not real charities and the beggars are neither deaf nor dumb.Wave them away with a stern ‘Non’ and if they persist don’t get you purse or wallet out; they will look inside and demand you open zipped pockets. Just keep waving them on. The same applies to the dodgy old men who ask you to take their picture in front of a building, such as Notre Dame and then say they want a selfy with you instead, while they try to grope you or get in your pockets. 
  9. Avoid buying from the street vendors of cheap tat, of which there are many. They are usually men carrying strings of mini Eiffal towers and will offer 1, then 2, then 3, etc. up to five for a Euro. Again, ‘Non’ and carry on walking.
  10. Remember your manners; it isn’t hard to learn ‘Oui’, ‘Non’, ‘Bonjour’, ‘Bonsoir’, ‘Merci’ and ‘Si’l vous plais’. Also ‘pardon’ is useful for getting through crowds.
  11. If you want tea buy some tea bags from Franprix or one of the other supermarkets, the tea bags in the hotel room are not great.The Louvre has a tea shop in the food court but it’s expensive tea. I had a quick look and had a heart attack. 
  12. The airport security and much nicer and more thoughrough than they are in England (in my limited experience) and can be very helpful and funny. In fact service in general is really good. 
  13. Getting in to any country is easy, getting out is the problem.
  14. France in August is hot and you can’t get a decent cup of tea anywhere.
  15. McDonalds is the same everwhere, except where it isn’t. There are local differences but in general the menu is predictable; this is useful on your first night when you’re knackered and can’t be bothered with anything too complicated.

I’m baaack!

We’re back in England and I am exhausted; we’re currently sat at the bus stop waiting for a bus back to Harrogate. I’m looking forward to getting back home tomorrow and sleeping in my own bed with my Hell Hounds. I’ve missed them, but it has been nice to have no responsibility for a change. 
I’m currently in Harrogate, and I have to say after the last few days of 30 degrees and clear skies, I’m enjoying the existence of clouds and cooler weather. I don’t think I’m built for hot weather. We had a bit of a wait at the airport this afternoon because we decided to go straight from the hotel to the airport and avoid the stress. Dragging the suitcases around for several hours would have been a bit of an arse as well. We got through security and passports and took up residence at Pret a Manger, had dinner and read for a few hours. 

In Paris I managed to spend almost all of my money and ate amazing food, treat myself to two new books and a copy of a quarterly literary journal, and a hat. We saw amazing sights and determined to go again another year to see even more. I particularly want to see L’Musee de le Homme
There will be more to come, including my ‘top 10 tips for visiting Paris’.
Bye
Rosie

Blog hiatus

The blog is on hiatus as your humble writer is having her first proper holiday in sixteen years. I am in Paris. Normal service will resume Saturday with a review of our hotel. Meanwhile, here is the view from our window.